Simon Foster: Tobes, I don't want to have to read you the riot act but I am going to have to read you some extracts from the riot act, like section one, paragraph one: don't leave your boss twisting in the wind and then burst in late, smelling like a pissed seaside donkey.Even the deleted scenes were funnier than anything else I've seen this year, with the possible exception of Up in the Air.
Toby Wright: Look, alright, I was late for the meeting, Simon, I am sorry, but it's not like I threw up in there, is it?
Simon Foster: No, you're right, I'm being unfair. I should be thanking you for not throwing up. Well done, you're a star. You didn't wet yourself, did you? You're in the right city. You didn't say anything overtly racist. You didn't pull your cock out and start plucking it and shouting "Willy Banjo". No, I'm being really unfair. You'd got so much right, without actually being there in the beginning of one of the most important moments of my career. Thanks, you're a legend.
...
Jamie MacDonald: Hi, Toby, Toby. Very pleased to meet you. Please sit down. Now, right, that's enough of all the fucking Oxbridge pleasantries.
Toby Wright: What's Oxbridge about saying hello?
Jamie MacDonald: Shut it, Love Actually! Do you want me to hole punch your face?
Mr. Ben and I had a rather Brit-themed weekend, what with the "Full English" brunch at Chip Shop and reading Harry Potter aloud as we cooked. It reminded me that I really, really want to go to Britain. The lake country! Stonehenge! Oxford! Cranford! (Is that a real place?) I want to go every damn village I've ever read about and, while Mr. Ben is distracted by the Tower of London or something, make out with every cute, tall, deadpan, angular, well-dressed bloke I can find. And I wouldn't say no to Kate Winslet, either.
3 comments:
If you ever need a quick laugh:
1) Open up google maps
2) Click on a random spot in Britain
3) Zoom in
4) Laugh at all the funny town and village names.
My latest batch: Stoke Goldington, Luffield Abbey, Marstone Moretaine, Lower Stondon...
You can't make this stuff up.
Sadly, while Google used to tell you how to get to London from NYC (http://www.onefloorup.com/uploaded_images/April07/0405-atlantic_swim.jpg), it doesn't anymore...
Easily one of my 3 or 4 favorite movies of the year. I'm surprised you didn't go with a Malcolm quote, but perhaps you thought that too obvious.
The thing should win best screenplay.
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