Tuesday, December 20, 2005

"here's your bonus, happy holidays -- oh, and you're fired"

Things I am grateful for:

I never acquired expensive habits (cocaine, which I hear is fun, for example. Or gym memberships.)

I didn't run up credit card debt.

I'm only on one prescription medication. (Still, health insurance is the worst habit to have to kick. It feels so great to know that even if you step on a crack and you fall and break your back, or your kidney's suddenly throbbing and you have to go to the ER, you'll be covered.)

They're going to pay me for the next two weeks, during which I don't have to come into work because, duh, it's vacation time anyway.

Mr. Ben, who, like a good daddy bird while mommy bird recovers in the nest from her 1.5-hour-long 32-degree walk of shame, went to fetch some hot food.

My friends and family who I'm sure will be very supportive and love me even though i've just been "let go." In their position, I wouldn't be, that's for sure. I'd be like, "Bitch, get you to an ice floe. Space is valuable in this city. Shit, even air is valuable, and it's for winners only, okay? Thanks."

At least I have tomorrow off now. And gosh darn it, I can do whatever I want.

If only I could figure out what I want to do. Well, except this: they stressed how smart I am -- how responsible, but mostly how smart. Maybe I can find a job that will actually value that.


shira said...

seriously, greg's kids? i'm sure we can arrange to have them go beat up the people at your former office. it's not like any of them are at school anyway.

Adam said...

From the title of this post, I gather that work life is little more than a big monopoly game. Still, sucks to land on Park Lane, as it were, and owe a shitload of money to a seven-year-old with more credit than is safe. Just pass go, collect $200, and call me in the morning. (PS. I know it's Boardwalk in this country, but I think the British Park Lane sounds nicer.)

Anonymous said...

ki love you!

Anonymous said...

and by ki, i mean i.

Anonymous said...

ester! worry not! i will be jobless in a month! i haven't even told you my work horror stories. anyway, jonah and i will come visit new york next year.


Rebecca said...

i am with the everyone, darling, when they say that
1. you rock
2. i am jobless as well.

maybe it's time we set about saving the world? mid twenties crisis time!

Britta said...

Hey Ester,
I haven't talked to you in a long time, but I do read your blog (now that I can get around Chinese censorship) and let me tell you, it's becoming increasingly hard to tell if my job is better than unemployment. Don't worry, you only have like, another 70 or something years to show the world your fabulousness.