with matza and moror shall they eat it

oh, the bitterness of one caught in the grip of passover. not to be irreverent or anything, but i spend much more time over the eight days of this holiday thinking about how hungry i am than i do thinking about the slavery of my people in egypt thousands of years ago. i mean, sure, bondage was bad but god, i'm hungry. even when i eat, i'm hungry. these are the eight days when being vegetarian truly, truly sucks: the variety in your diet basically boils down to fish, eggs, vegetables, cheese, and then more of the same. occasionally, when you've topped out on mercury but you feel you can squeeze in just a tiny bit more cholesterol, french fries.

ugh.

only about 24 more hours. that's a comfort. meanwhile, how unjewish is a holiday when you're not allowed to eat? how maddeningly inconsistent. you know why the holiday lasts eight days, by the way? no? that's because there IS NO REASON. the best answer i've ever gotten is that jewish holidays are always either two days or eight days so - passover's eight. in my humble opinion, passover should remain only two days, the two days of the seders, since the seders are the most exciting part. (when you have an entire holiday whose purpose is to exclude a food group, a bunch of people sitting around a table eating horseradish in unison is a circus. it's a regular mardi gras.)

through the heavy fog of my disgruntlement, i can still recognize the joy of my life: my new laptop is indeed, as advertised, a little white god that sits on my lap and fairly coos at me with pleasure. i still need a name for it, "little white god" being cumbersome and sacriligious. hum.