ross rebecca ben and i are all in the library, alternately working and making nuisances of ourselves. much recent discussion of a) whether ross should hook up w/ someone while alyssa is faraway and otherwise engaged (spiritually); b) if a) yes, then w/ whom?; c) should becca as well and w/ whom?; d) and what should happen over fall break. we' ve had these plans to visit ross's mythical house in "wanakena" which is in the "adirondacks" (please note that thru the use of quotation marks, i am conveying that i'm not sure these "places" exist) for about as long as we've known each other. they've never worked out, always for lack of a car. i refuse to predict whether this will be Different. i live my life free of expectations -- it's less messy that way.

ester's rules of happiness: 1) want what you can have; 2) don't need what you want; 3) enjoy what you're good at.

much drama recently. an urgent-seeming guestbook message from ari. an intense one from jay. an unexpected (serendipitous?) invitation by an acquaintance to co-direct a play for black history month that i've never read and feel rather unqualified to helm. it could easily be an excellent, unique experience for me, or it could be awful and uncomfortable all the way thru. ilana's dorm struck by a fierce, site-specific tornado. ben frenzied. joel unintentionally creating a shortlived but frightening grease fire in our kitchen: he was more affected than the kitchen was and more ashamed than burnt.
me tired. damn my fellow barnies: when are we going home?