ohhhhh wonderful wonderful computer ... i could kiss you, i could, if you weren't so primly unresponsive.

music: "mr. right now" from the nields. good to listen to stuff i don't have on cd, just from now-defunct napster (you have to update? what the hell? i assume it's part of the grand scheme to eventually deprive us of all our music. ah well. you were good while you had the opportunity to be, napster.)

i'm distracted. surely there are things to say, they're just escaping me at present. ben and i have been playing phone tag since early yesterday, which was six-months-of-what day. that priceless phrase was coined by miss lana and it made me think. what an odd relationship it's been: the first three months we were together, and then an equal amount of time we were across the country from each other. hands down, the separation was more difficult. do all bunnies find it so? since june, i have:
developed an antipathy to telephones;
visited CA for the first time;
missed someone -- really missed them;
loved reciprocally;
and dealt w/ the opposite, an emotional vaccuum that scared me until i remembered the horror of prolonged wednesdays.
it's been eye-opening. six months of what indeed.

beach was lovely. our good luck w/ the weather lasted, as did miss lana's and my psychic connection. our emotions/desires continued to coincide: when we wanted to beach, we beached; when we wanted to porch, we porched (i got much excellent reading done: in america by sontag blew me away, and i'm three-quarters done w/ tom jones.) towards the end, family relations got a little strained and everyone's patience w/ joanna was pretty much smoke and ashes. lana handled it all admirably, never once losing her cool, for which i'm grateful.
i'm so lucky to have this group of friends ... i returned home to a letter from becca that made me say "aww" outloud and repeatedly. lana and i parted over sweet words. and i made a full list of other similar type occurrances but blogger just erased it all. luckily i had saved everything up to that last line so not too much disappeared. i don't feel like going thru it again; suffice it to say, the gods are indulgent and i appreciate it.
i'm scared to return to swat. i'm always scared to leave wherever i am. damn i'm a wuss. it'll be fine. of course it will.

as to net fellows: dacicle let me know i'm missed, and kat wrote heart-fluttery things about me on her site and in my book. i wonder what will change over the fall. not that there's any point in wondering. all right: i wish then for this fall to be as interesting and enjoyable in unexpected ways as this summer was. is. it's not over yet.