evals
 
one of the RAs, E., slumped down next to me looking more frazzled than usual.  the dean of residential life had given her a talking-to about her performance.  not for any legitimate reason: E. may be a little spacey sometimes, and she doesn't always remember to brush her hair, let alone make her scheduled presences, but her girls love her and she's great with them.
 
i shook my head and tsked with her and we commiserated for a while.  then she startled me.
what do you do?, she asked.  do you have any tips? 
 
i couldn't understand what she was saying at first.  what i do?  with what?
 
your girls, she said.  what do you do with your girls that works?
 
it still took me a couple seconds to process that she was asking me for advice.  not about what movie to rent or word choice in an essay.  about campers --  kids.  that moment made me realize i've been successful here.  i've given someone the impression that i know what i'm doing.  at least enough.
 
at the same spot on campus a few hours previously, i'd been sitting conversing with a couple different ladies, L. and Sh.  Both were expressing their confidence in the idea of marriage.  L. has been dating a guy for 1 and a half years and she knows he's right.  She won't marry him til she's done with skool, but marriage is there.  On the table, in the cards. 
Sh., though she doesn't have the exact person lined up yet, is similarly engaged to the idea.  more than anything else, she said, i want to have kids.  that's the easiest way.
 
when i said i wasn't sure about marriage, ever, let alone in the forseable future, both sorta gaped at me.  Sh. said, predictably, But what about kids?
 
another RA had joined us, a guy, S.  he chortled.  No way, he said.  ester's not having kids.
why not?, asked Sh.  i think she'd make a great mom.
no way, said S.  and chortled again.
 
the funny thing is, being here has made me curious about having kids.  they're such strange creatures and i spend all day watching them, wondering, Do they have inner lives?  what do they think about?  i almost want to have one just so i can know one intimately, collect data or have something to base theories on besides fading memories of what i was like as a pre-teen.  maybe that's not an adequate reason.  on the other hand, i neglected to ask the two ladies i was talking to what their reasons were.  maybe they only would have gaped more profusely.