too tired to write much -- only wanted to mention briefly that (1) my mother returned home late tonite while i was on the phone w/ tamar. i heard vague commotion but couldn't place it. when i emerged from my room, i realized she was in hers, with the lights off. cautiously, deciding i had to risk it, i walked in. "are you okay?" i whispered. "yes," said my mother. "i just had too much wine. and a martini!"
at which point i burst out laughing and more readily approached the bed. my silly mother was affirmatively tipsy, enuf so to repeat an off-color joke that of course i am much too ladylike to repeat here. she was also sober enuf that we could talk some -- not about yesterday, of course; just about general stuff, sufficient to reassure me that she does not in fact hate me and that i could even go so far as to say perhaps that all is well.

also (2) tamar called me just when i had been thinking of calling her and asked me precisely what i had wanted to ask her: for a date. just the two of us, exploring the wonders of rockvellian cuisine. ah wavelengths.

(3) matthew stark bumped into condit today, or so he says: "literally." (i refuse to engage in chandra gossip -- suffice it to say, the woman is either pulling a sheinbein and in the holy land [jay's notion], or pregnant in belize [ilana's grandmother's], or else hidden in a painting somewhere, a la roald dahl's the witches.)

(4) t - 1 days, really, til my day. wow. i'll be 19. ...