under orders from one i can't refuse to post. my gums still hurt slightly from my quick transit from waiting room to dentist's chair, hygieneist (sp?) to dentist, sure i floss, no problem i'll floss more then out the door to spit in the ivy and wait to be picked up. funny how that trip is always the same, down to the lying about flossing. they expect that, don't they, and if they expect it how could it be unethical?
pre-that, went down w/ adam to get flu shots. i had betsey brown to keep me company but adam was antsy. the woman who received us was positively incredulous. "but it's flu season," she said, "everyone's gotten flu shots already or else the flu." yes well we're under orders from mother so no time for logic, thanks. she shrugs, says she'll defrost some posthaste, disappears. minutes pass. finally i get called up, pay my $15, return to the plastic chair with my book. more minutes. adam fidgets. getting late, have to go soon. he asks what's up. turns out the woman forgot to give me a sheet to give to the nurses. apologizing profusely offering a sheet now but it will then be another half an hour and no-can-do have to be up connecticut avenue already. we get our money back and sigh out.

so i didn't get stuck and i roughly made it on time to have my gums poked. found out the third of my grades, leaving just one holdout -- this is like pulling teeth, i just want to know already. thus far i'm happy-surprised. passed stat! yeah you bet. brother and father argued loudly about churchill in the car. the last time i was with them it was stalin. lots of mideast talk. meanwhile a news report about a palestinian gunman crashing a batmitzvah and shooting blindly knocks idealism out of me. they have a tape somehow: ohsofamiliar music interrupted by blasts, then screams. suddenly i'm as bitter as my family. i halfhope it passes, halfknow that even if it does nothing will change and no one, right wing or left, really has any hope.

meanwhile, a big meanwhile, darling elizabeth has granted me permission to link to her website, lazyqueer. she emailed me pointers on how to meet gayfolk in denmark which i need because i'm so accustomed to being surrounded that i'll go into withdrawal without them. jamie for dinner tonite, back from galavanting around south africa. also finished the book my aunt sent me, Happy all the Time. once i stopped resisting it i found it sweet and enjoyable. like Say Goodnite Gracie for grownups.